LET’S TALK ABOUT PAIN

• We live in a less than perfect world…a fallen world. And because of that, it is impossible to live life without pain. We can’t escape pain. Everyone experiences hurt one way or another. Emotional and mental hurts are the wounds of one’s soul. Many of us are carrying wounds from their past. They don’t want to acknowledge it, remember it, nor talk about it. But for us to walk out our calling and fulfill our God-given purpose, that pain must be healed.
• We must understand that emotional and mental wounds, don’t heal like physical wounds. The wounds of our soul don’t heal until we make the decision to give them to God.
• The purpose of today’s message is to give you some answers about questions you may have about the hurts you have experienced in life and also to hopefully point you in the right direction on how you, yourself, can go after your emotional, mental, and spiritual healing. No one else can fix you. It’s you “doing” your part and allowing God to do His.

REASONS WHY PEOPLE AREN’T HEALED FROM THEIR PAIN.

3 reasons why people aren’t healed of emotional and mental wounds of the soul…

1. They do not know how to get help.
2. They are intimidated and rejected (belittled, despised, scorned) by others.
3. They find themselves stuck somewhere in the healing process.

IDENTIFYING WOUNDS OF THE SOUL (What are “wounds of the soul”?)

• Wounds of the soul are hurts or pain that we have allowed in our lives by opening the door to sin OR the wounds or pain caused by sin done against us.

2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.[a] The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.

• Our soul consists of our mind, will, and our emotions.

Galatians 6:7 NIV

Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.

1 Samuel 18:1 ESV

As soon as he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.

1 Corinthians 6:16 ESV

Or do you not know that he who is joined[a] to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For, as it is written, “The two will become one flesh.”

Proverbs 4:23 NIV

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.

• Do you know why we must guard our heart? Because our heart can be deceiving.

Jeremiah 17:9 ESV

The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?

• Jesus died an excruciatingly horrible death on the Cross so that He could take ALL of our sins so that anyone who calls on His name will be forgiven.
• When we repent (confess – and walk out the consequences) with a sincere heart and turn to Jesus, ALL of our sins are forgiven! We are His!
• Nowhere does it say that Jesus says, “Ok I will forgive you, but since you are in a soul tie, I need you to say these words first so that I can do what I need to do to help you and forgive you.”

SIX THINGS THAT OPEN THE DOOR TO SIN (eventually wounding our soul)

1) CO-DEPENDENCY

Galatians 1:10 ESV

For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant[a] of Christ.

2) IDOLATRY

Exodus 20:3 ESV

“You shall have no other gods before[a] me.

3) TRAUMA

Proverbs 13:12 ESV

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.

4) LACK OF CONTROL

5) UNFORGIVENESS

Matthew 6:15 ESV
but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.

6) DEMONIC ACTIVITY

(Any activity that is against God. Rebellion, stubbornness, lying, manipulation, guilt, perversion, distortion of the truth, covenants made outside of God’s plan, etc. are activities that can open the door for satan to operate in your life.)

John 10:10 ESV

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.

1 John 1:9 ESV

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

• When we stop disguising sin, excusing sin, when we can identify the sin and the open door, we can break its power through repentance. (“Forgive me God for I have sinned against You.)
• We must stop making spiritual justifications for doors that we are choosing to open. If we want true freedom, we have to close the door to sin.

THE PROCESS OF HEALING

1) OVERCOME DENIAL

• What are ways that we deny pain?
  • We turn off all emotion and split from the event. (Disassociation)
  • We become defensive.
  • We open doors to addictions, specifically drug and alcohol.

• Regardless of how denial manifests, it blocks the healing process.
• Once a person is willing to face the reality and pain of his past and denial is overcome, a door is then opened to his emotions.

2) DEALING WITH OUR ANGER

• This anger is manifested in two different ways:
  • Anger turned outward or
  • Anger turned inward (Self-hate, self-mutilation)

• We must come to a point where we articulate the reasons for our anger.

James 1:21-25 NKJV

“Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was. But he who looks into the perfect law of liberty and continues in it and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer of the work, this one will be blessed in what he does.”

Ephesians 4:26 ESV

Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger,

• Anger is a normal and natural response to abuse and violation. However, anger must be appropriately expressed and ultimately released.
• Once you can articulate the reasons for your anger, you need to submit it to the Holy Spirit. Prayerfully, we must give our anger to God, asking Him to help us express it and discover the feelings it may be masking.
• We must also repent of any sinful behavior or bitterness your anger may have caused.

3) ENTERING A GRIEVING STAGE

Revelation 3:20 ESV

Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.

• We naturally want to take away a person’s bad feelings. However, it is most important that the hurting person get in touch with his pain, feel it, and allow Jesus to heal it.
• Any effort to bypass this process of healing will delay the cure.
• As we grieve our way through the pain, Jesus heals our heart.

Psalms 55:4-8 ESV

My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death have fallen upon me. Fear and trembling come upon me, and horror overwhelms me. And I say, “Oh, that I had wings like a dove! I would fly away and be at rest; yes, I would wander far away; I would lodge in the wilderness; Selah.  I would hurry to find a shelter from the raging wind and tempest.”

• It takes great courage to be honest and allow God to reveal the wounds of our soul. Though it may hurt for a season, Jesus is faithful and will never leave you nor forsake you. Our prayer for you is that you would trust Jesus to walk you through your hurts.

Matthew 12:20-21 ESV

a bruised reed he will not break, and a smoldering wick he will not quench, until he brings justice to victory; 21 and in his name the Gentiles will hope.”

• These verses speak of the gentleness and care Jesus takes in dealing with fragile lives. The devil wants us to believe God is disgusted with us and too far away, up in heaven somewhere, far away from our hurts.
• The most important ingredient in receiving emotional healing is faith in God and His love for us. Trust in Jesus. Allow Him to come into the painful areas of your life.

Psalm 23:1-6 ESV

The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He makes me lie down in green pastures.
He leads me beside still waters.[a] 3 He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness[b] for his name’s sake. 4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,[c] I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 6 Surely[d] goodness and mercy[e] shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell[f] in the house of the Lord forever.[g]

SCARS OF THE SOUL

• Wounds need to be healed. They need to be identified, cared for (medicated), and properly dressed. Scars are wounds that have healed. Scars tell the story of something that caused you pain or was meant to take you out but did not succeed.
• We remember our scars, but they no longer can hurt us. But when we turn that wound over to God, that scar reminds us of when God stepped in. How the power of God manifested His glory in our lives.

Ephesians 5:13 NIV

But everything exposed by the light becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light.

So if you are struggling with issues of the soul, there are three simple steps you can take.

1. Guard your heart.
2. Repent.
3. Turn to Jesus.

• If you realize you have wounds of your heart that need to be healed, consider praying this prayer:

“Jesus, give me the courage to face the wounds of my soul. You know the deepest secrets and the hidden places of my heart. Break down the denial in my heart that causes me to see myself and others dishonestly. Give me clear eyes, Lord, to perceive the truth about my life. Forgive me for the sins I’ve committed by avoiding the truth. I cast the burden of my pain on You and trust You to sustain me. Please Lord, heal the wounds of my soul and lead me to emotional and mental health. In Jesus’ Name, Amen!”

You are not bonded to anyone. Your soul is not tied to the person who hurt you. You have an open door that needs to be closed. You need to identify that open door, forgive the person who hurt you (release them to the judgement of God).